9dp 3dt...that was fast

Pregnancy symptoms gone....my boobs aren't even sore anymore. As a matter of fact....it is starting to feel more and more like Flo is about to show :(

I have all the signs....slight weight gain, gastrointestinal issues and now I understand the fatigue...probably just ordinary monthly Flo fatigue. I even feel like the blood is starting to flow. I put a pad on before leaving the house (No tampons ....nothing in the vag until the pg test)

There are a few pregnancy symptoms that are missing and I should be able to notice by this point in the cycle. (Remember that even though my pregnancy test is scheduled for Monday, it should technically be done on Saturday...thanks to the no pg test at Cornell on the weekend rule....boo!)No tender boobs or big nipples. No constipation, no super sense of smell and no food cravings. All of those signs are missing and therefore, I am sure that this did not work...yet again. How could I go from being so hopeful yesterday to so hopeless a day later?

Just not sure where to go from here. I don't think I can make myself do a DE cycle. I am fine with using a donor but I am so scared that it will not work. It's one thing to use my own eggs but if I can't even make a young chickie's eggs work in my body I will feel utterly useless. It just seems like we'll be going down another road that we won't be able to stop on...just like IVF. How many DE cycles will we do because we are too afraid to stop? At some point you need to analyze the cost vs. the historical outcome vs. the odds and I guess it makes sense to stop before going the donor route. Just like the rest of my life...so close yet so far away.